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Meditation Practice Archives • Peace on Tap

How to Meditate

Deep Breathing

The only prerequisite to meditation is that you know how to breathe.   If you are reading this, congratulations! You can meditate.

Everyone can meditate, even you.

I started trying to meditate back in 2010. At the time, I had a roommate who turned out to be an alcoholic. I found out in the second week after he moved in.  Living with someone who has a substance abuse issue will wreak havoc in your home and creates issues with every other part of your life. I came to realize that trying to reason with an intoxicated person was a waste of my time and energy. I wasn’t relaxing at home because my roommate was drunk every evening and partying on my couch like a 20-year-old college girl.  I was sleep deprived due to the noise and that started to affect my work. My mind was foggy, I felt stuck and unable to think.

At the time, I came across an article that recommended meditation for various reasons but what stood out to me was a sentence that read, “If you ever feel stuck or at a crossroads, meditate for 5 minutes and soon enough you will be able to know exactly what you should do.”

I was desperate! I felt like I had nothing to lose and anything to gain.

The next day, during my lunch break I walked through the streets of downtown Honolulu trying to find a spot to sit and close my eyes. A block away from my place of work was the Honolulu Post office. It contained a hall that had somewhere to sit where I could lean my back against a pillar and no foot traffic. Plants and grass framed the pillars, and this made me feel peaceful and calm. it was perfect!

I took out my phone and set the timer for five minutes. I closed my eyes and listened to all the sounds around me like I had read to do. I thought I would find this distracting, but it was soothing. I listened and 2 minutes into it a thought popped into my head!  My sister was leaving Hawaii and moving to Dallas which meant that she was vacating her BEAUTIFUL apartment.  I was sure her roommates would be looking for a new roommate.  Why had this not occurred to me before! Sure, I had the lease in my name for my current apartment but with the right negotiations, I could get out of it and into this other place.  I felt scared because I would have to make many maneuvers and being tired,  everything seemed much more difficult. But the possibilities elated me.

I continued to meditate five minutes during my lunch break in the coming weeks as self-therapy from all the chaos at home. Soon after that realization, I moved into that apartment that overlooked the city, ocean, and mountains. It had a wonderful pool surrounded by plants and mountains. I floated in that same pool facing to the clear blue skies and I recognized a familiar feeling. I had experienced this sensation time and time again during my meditation and here I was, reliving it in reality.  I ended up having a wonderful new roommate from Lomas Linda and we had the best conversations in the evenings.  I am still friends with her to this day.  Shout out to her if she is reading this! You know who you are!

New Apartment

I could have booted my old roommate out and kept the apartment but instead, I went into a new path that led me to a better place with wonderful new people.

It’s true when I tell my friends that I only learned to meditate as my last resort.

Now that I have been meditating consistently, I can give you tricks that I’ve learned through my own experience and pass down helpful advice from friends who are more experienced.

Tips to Start your Meditation Practice

  • Making it a habit is KEY!
  • Choose a place where you will always meditate. This will give your mind cues that it’s meditation time and you will start to build associations.
  • Meditation isn’t about keeping uncomfortable poses for long periods of time. It’s about breathing and having your spine aligned.
Correct Meditation Pose
  • As you can see above, she has her spine stacked and aligned. Also, her thighs are lowered than her waist, this will open your diaphragm and allow you to breathe easier. You can prop yourself up with a cushion, towel, block, or whatever you can find to sit on and feel comfortable. Anything works if you’re comfortable. This is important.
  • Meditate in the morning. I meditate first thing in the morning and away from my bed as suggested by a friend. I’ve noticed that my mind is calmer in the mornings and this makes it easier to enter into a meditative state.
  • If you find it difficult to relax, use the rule of 3 –   Take a deep breath, hold it for 4 seconds, breath out and repeat this 3 times.  This will cause your body to tense up and release, automatically putting you in a calmer state.

Some days will be good, and some days will be a struggle. The important thing is that you showed up to meditate.

How do I Start my Meditation Practice?

  • Tonight, set your alarm 15 minutes before your usual waking time.
  • Go to sleep
  • Wake up when your alarm goes off.
  • Walk to your designated area (Don’t meditate near your bed. If you see your bed you will get right back in it. Trust me on this!)
  • Make sure your back is supported with some type of backrest (chair, sitting against a wall or a couch. The possibilities are endless.  Keep your back straight- no slouching.)
  • Set alarm for 10 minutes. (you spent 5 mins trying to do all the above).
  • Close your eyes. Focus on your breathing coming in and out your nose. Listen to your surroundings. Always maintain a steady flow with your breathing.
  • The alarm goes off. Done!

You did it! Don’t worry if you got distracted. There is always tomorrow and the day after that.

Great job you!

You have officially meditated, and you are on your way to making it a habit!

Now you can go off into your day and tackle whatever comes your way.

Meditation Tips for Beginners:

When you first start to meditate, don’t force yourself too much to focus. Allow yourself to feel whatever feelings you have been suppressing for a while. You finally sat down and are in a quiet place, things will come up. You might realize that you are upset and start crying. Do it!   See this as a moment of purging. Make room for you. It will be difficult to enter a meditative state if you have something tugging away at you. Get rid of the baggage first.

When you meditate feel your feelings. You feel a lump in your throat? A pain in your stomach? Whatever it is that you are sensing, sense it. Once you focus on your body, you will start to digest whatever you feel, and it will surface and dissipate.

Meditation is about giving yourself room to feel what you don’t have time to feel during the day. Once you get rid of what is holding you up, then you will feel inner peace. Because you allowed whatever was bothering you to surface, and then it’s gone, forever. Well, until the next time. Which is why you are going to meditate every day! Meditation gives you the opportunity to listen to your body, mind, and spirit.  It’s your time to love and care for yourself.

-K